Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Thinking Outside The Box

I know, I know, I have updated in a few days, (read: months) But I have a good reason. Life with Simon these last few months has gotten hectic. By that I mean, he's fine,but I'm in full on stress and worry mode.

Back in late March, early April Simon started to show signs of having a health issue. He was sneezing and snorting and had a severe runny nose. We took him to the vets, the vet gave us his thoughts on what might be wrong, as well as a months worth of meds.

The meds are gone now, and he seems to be fully on the mend. I, however, am still watching him in full over protective mama mode. Which has kept me maybe just a little busy.

It has also given me time to do some thinking. As a writer my mind is always working and thinking about what I want to do next. What story or idea is moving me now.

And what better idea than ... Simon.

I'm not sure how I want to go about this, but it feels like a good project to try. I'm still working on all my other projects, just adding a few news ones.

I'm open to ideas on this, so comment, share, and let me know.

E and Simon.

Monday, March 24, 2014

I've turned him into a Beatles fan

I may have said this in my personal blog, I've been on a bit of a Beatles kick the last month or so. Along for the ride, as always, is Simon. And it seems I have found another Beatles fan in him as well. The minute I turn on a Beatles song, Simon seems to be in an instant contented mood. He doesn't mind if mommy sings one or two to him too.

I love finding things like this. He has always been such a relaxing and calming part of my life. It's good to find things, besides me, that relax him.

Speaking of relaxing, we have been doing a lot of that lately. Neither one of us are big fans of cold weather and snow. With almost sixteen year old joints, I don't blame him. This crappy weather has also gave a lack in adventures to update on Simon, as most of the time he's sleeping.

I'm not sure how I got so lucky to have such a cool dog, but I sure am glad everyday he's mine.

Emily and Simon

Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Have Blankie, Will Travel

I sometime have a hard time coming up with topics to blog about here. Not because I lack for things, but because there's so many to choose from. I'm thankful for the fact that I do have an overabundance of moments.

Today was a cuddle day, as most are now, with the cold weather and snow. I spend my days putting off getting work done, not that it's a hard sacrifice to make, in favor of holding a sleeping Simon blankie and all.The last few weeks have seen me spending hours like that. A small head resting on my chest, or napping with his head on mine.

I have taken up reading to him in these moments. Picking a random book from my collection or the library book I brought home from work. I read softly into his ear as he snores. I'm not sure how much of what I say he understands, but the small sighs of contentment make me feel like he enjoys those moments just as much as me.

When not reading to him, I watch him sleep. Feel his body move in his dream world. It's a good life he has now. When we first got him, my mother saw his bottom jaw didn't meet his top one. It made his eating harder to do. that day started a habit that started the spoiling snowball. We hand fed him. Picking up his food bite by bite. Letting him eat his whole meal from our hands. He's comfortable to eat on his own now, but still gets his own hamburger bought and cooked for him.

It's mixed into his dog food and lovingly molded into a pile for him. He also eats in my room, in a spot where I can see him and him me. He gets to relax and take his time. He eats as I work on my book or a blog. Taking breaks to come over and visit, maybe ask for a hug and kiss.

He doesn't have a dog bed, never used them when he has had one. Instead he sleeps in the big bed. He has his own collection of blankets. They all rest on the bed for him to cuddle up into. When I'm working and can't hold him, which is rare, he lays watching me from his blanket pile on my bed.

Is he spoiled? Sure. But he's also greatly loved and taken care of. I want to thank Simon. I want to thank him for picking me to love him. For trusting me to take care of him.

There is also those (rare) troublemaker moments. I love those too!

Thursday, January 23, 2014

That thing I don't want to think about

So as I sit at my desk to type this, Simon watching my every move ( just in case there's room to be held, and or food) and Pandora playing softly in the background, I have a weird feeling come over me. It's not something I can really place a label to, but over the last few months that feeling has been popping up more often.

I'm not sure where it's coming from, or why it seems to hit me in the lest expected moments, but it's here. I think it started to creep up on me right around the time my Simon turned fifteen. It's an age that comes with a new set of things to learn and handle. Remembering to give him a daily pill for his aging joints, more so now that the whole country is in deep freeze, a bit more unexpected bathroom accidents. He tries, but the urge gets him before he can get us, he never gets punished for it, I don't feel it's his fault.

We don't seem to have the urge to play with our toys as much, most days now not at all, even though mommy continues to buy them for us. Sleep tends to entertain most of our day now, normally under a mountain of 'blankies'. I know what your gonna say, it's part of aging and he's fine just slowing down. You're right, and I accept that, I'm getting older too. I know that besides a few signs of aging, he is still in good health. He does have a slight heart murmur, but dogs and humans alike can live long full lives with those.

It's the part that comes after that has me heartbroken and lost. Learning to let him go...that one day...when the time comes. That feeling catches me at night, watching him sleep, or like the other day when my father called me at work to say he was keeping an eye on him, but was doing a strange back and forth sway. It's in getting everything lined up for what do when that day finally does happen.

I knew the moment that little paw wiggled it's way down my shirt he was mine, I was his and it was love. I also knew he was going to cause me the worst heartbreak. I think though, that that's what real love is, giving yourself over to someone or something knowing they can destroy you.

I think part of grief is these moments. Having that feeling hit you without reason to be feeling it. Maybe it's our bodies way of protecting us, softening the blow. Though to be honest, I don't think it ever really is. These little guys aren't just pets, they are family. We grieve them as we do our human family.

When I started this blog, part of my intention for it was to be a scrape book, a memory of my time and the life that got to be here, that got to love me and I got to love back. I haven't been the best at posting here as I hoped to be, and the reason for that is simply because there's so many. They are all locked in my head or in my camera, I have to sort them out. I want them wrote down, it's a big life to not let it be remembered in writing.

I have enjoyed every moment, happy and sad, Simon has given me. And I plan to continue to enjoy every moment I get to have with him. My six years and counting, have been some of the best ever, with the best dog ever. No matter what anyone else thinks.

Emily and Simon