Wednesday, June 24, 2015

The Photo The Never Was

So the next few days, and next few blog posts are going to be very hard for me. I may have mentioned it before, but this Friday marks six months that my Angel Simon has been at Rainbow Bridge. For me that's the day time stops. It marks a day that forever changed me.

It's also making me think about all of the wonderful times, and memories I got to have with Simon. And I wanted to share a big one with you. I may have told this story in short hand in other blog posts, but this is going to be the full story about the day I took the photos below, and forever changed my life.





 The date on these pictures is August 17th, 2007. In November of 2006 I had lost a little girl Bichon Frise, named Precious. She had to be put to sleep because of issues with her heart, and losing her had broken mine. I had also lost my grandmother in February of that same year. To say I was broken, and lost is an understatement. Everything in my world that I loved was gone.


I had told anyone who would listen I was NEVER getting another dog. I just wasn't going to put myself through that again. A few people said they understood, and agreed with me that loving and losing these pets are very hard. Some told me that I would find one I liked, and one day have a pet again. I wanted to scream at both parties that they didn't understand, and that no I wasn't going to get another pet.

So when one day a good friend and co-worker, who also happens to be in a Dachshund rescue group asked me to help her with her new fosters adoption photos, I thought nothing much of it. I would go, take there picture, email her the good ones. She posts them on the rescues website with a bio on the dog, and my job and good deed is done.

I. Was. Wrong. Very wrong.

The first dog she introduced me to was Simon. She was on her back porch holding him, telling me he was one of her tender ones. He was going to need only the best home. She also told me he would do better being carried to the spot I was going to take his pictures. Those words were soon followed by this little brown body being handed to me over the fence.

I looked at him, he looked at me... we had a small staring contest going on between us, as my friend gathered the rest of her "models"...and then he put his paw down my shirt.

In that moment, that little paw sliding its way down my shirt, created many things. I would realize only later, as he snored in my lap one day, that that move wasn't for safety, or from anxiety. He was claiming me. He had picked his person.

In looking back at the photos I took of him that day, to the photos I took of him those seven years he was mine. Those are two totally different dogs. The first one is shy and unsure...is wanting someone to love and save him. The dog after, was happy and sure of himself, he was safe, and loved.

I took a few shots of him, only to not find any of them worthy of his adoption page. I feel, even then, a part of me knew he was meant to be with me. Those adoption photos I took of him, never got emailed to his foster mom, they never got posted to his adoption page, and until this blog post, never got thought about again.

I'm glad I took those photos, I'm so very glad. Those photos are what helped me find just what I needed, when I didn't think I needed it.

Simon and I both were in need, we were broken and lost. In finding each other, we found our missing pieces. That thing we both needed to be whole.

I didn't just rescue him...he rescued me too.

There will never be another Simon. He was meant just for me.

The pain of loss is great, there's an ache in my chest that has yet to go away.

But the joy of love, of being loved, and of loving someone. Now that can take your breath away.

Emmy

4 comments:

  1. Thank you for sharing this post. We all know how you feel cos we have been lucky enough to be loved by the best.
    stella rose's momma

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  2. Very touching Post! I have lost many pets in my life and they all have such a special place in my heart. I still cry thinking of them but I also smile at all the memories they gave me. I hope you wrap all those memories of Simon around you and it comforts you greatly!!

    xoxo, Ginger, Matt & Matilda's Mom

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  3. You and Simon were meant to be. A wonderful life together filled with love. Always keep the good memories cose to your heart

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  4. Oh, Emmy, you are so right that these photos do show him looking sad and withdrawn. He really was curling up into a little ball just making himself as small as he could be. He needed love so desperately and you gave him that and so much more. I am so thankful you found each other when you did. Simon loves you just as much as you love him and he is causing a huge ruckus up at the Bridge. That little baby misses you so much, but he's also having so much fun with all his new pals. The girls are crazy about him and the boys love his antics! Little Drucy thinks she is falling in love and Blazer has a new bestest playmate in the world! Never forget that you gave Simon the best 7 years of his life and you had a lot of making up to do this, but he figures it was worth going through all the loneliness he felt until he met you! He'll always be your little boy. Love, Bazier, Drubo and Grandma Vicki

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