Well this is new. I've set down to type this blog, and I have no idea what I want to write. I try to keep my posts light and semi happy. I feel with all the sadness of losing such wonderful babies to the bridge, we all need a funny story or cute picture. I know I do. That's hard sometimes. And as I concentrate on what words I want to use, and what my point will be. I'm...stuck. I don't have the right words, or a cute Simon anecdote. I'm numb.
These pets, these "dogs" are anything but just a "pet". They are
family, our kids. For some of us, they are all we have. We love them as
they love us, unconditionally, and with everything we have. And when
they are gone our hearts break so deeply, sometimes we can't breathe the
pain is so bad. We didn't lose just a pet, we lost family.
Only a true dog lover, can understand this. For some of us, we are
not going to be ok in a few days.It takes time, LOTS of time. It hurts
my heart when I meet someone and they tell me they have never owned, or
been owned by a dog. You feel bad for me because my heart is breaking
over my dogs passing, well I feel bad for you, for never having been
loved by such a wonderful, and silly creature as a dog.
Had a bad day at work, that wagging tail, and panting tongue can make
it all better. They are a therapist that only asks for treats, and a
belly rub as payment. They keep our deepest secrets, and never judge us
for them. I think Simon knew more about me, than anyone in my life. I
know he often times had better advice.
This month, the 26th to be exact. Will be six months since Simon has
been gone to the bridge. I'm not really meaning to keep track. To be
honest, I don't want to. I don't want one minute without him, how did I
get to six months. That's half a year. I'm not ready yet. It still feels
like yesterday. I'm still far from ok.
Which makes me relive, and feel heart broken all over again when I
read another baby went to the bridge. I hurt for them, I hurt for me. I
want to tell everyone of them I know EXACTLY what they are going
through. I want to comfort them, and help them. I know words aren't
enough, there's not really anything we can do. It's the thought that
counts. To know we have friends, and people who understand. That let us
cry, and vent, and talk in circles.
You guys, this place, my blogs and memories. It's all I have now. I'm glad I have you. Thank you
I'm not sure what else to say. I'll try to have a funnier post next time.